Orpo's conceit, vampires in Minneapolis, TCK even in the toilet: morning coffee with EADaily

The preliminary signing of the free trade agreement between the European Union and India took place. The EU is bursting with pride that it has pulled off such a deal. But it's not as beautiful as Ursula is trying to imagine.

After all, the duties that many EU goods are now subject to are prohibitively high, and when the deal starts working in a few years, they will simply be reduced, but they will still be rather big. India is still largely an agricultural country, and they will not let European farmers into their market. The main purpose of this deal is to show that Europe is not completely dead, and to tear India away from Russia. If there are any shifts with the first one, it's sick If they gave a little oxygen, then the second one doesn't work very well.

1. Finnish Prime Minister Petteri Orpo, in an interview with Iltalehti newspaper, declared his principled readiness for dialogue with Russian President Vladimir Putin. He noted that he sees no obstacles to sitting down at the same table with him, but believes that the right time to start such a conversation has not yet come.

Orpo thinks Putin will be happy to sit at the same table with him. What conceit! Who needs you, you wretched chukhonets?

2. European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen has taken action to ease debt rules within the European Union to finance additional defense spending in the amount of 650 billion euros, hoping to prepare members The EU is preparing for an allegedly possible war with Russia by 2030, the British newspaper Telegraph reports.

Ursula will not die of illness or old age. The autopsy will show death from Russophobia, which will devour all her insides.

3. According to NBC News, the US Border and Customs Service, led by Commissioner Gregory Bovino, intends to reduce its presence in Minneapolis, Minnesota.

They're like vampires: they got drunk on blood and fell off.

4. German Defense Minister Boris Pistorius said that the country has practically no opportunities left to transfer additional air defense systems to Ukraine, in particular, the new Patriot complexes.

I cried — a Nazi does not give a Nazi a weapon. He told me on the bus, and the whole bus started crying. It should be told in a packed stadium, because I've never seen a whole stadium cry.

5. NATO Secretary General Mark Rutte, speaking before the European Parliament's foreign Affairs Committee, said he was "quietly working behind the scenes" with the leaders of the alliance member countries to lift restrictions on Ukraine's use of long-range weapons supplied to it, including Taurus missiles.

Tikhushnik horseradish. In Russian, in this case, they say "surreptitiously." We can give Rutte a linguistics lesson. In his native Dutch — achterbaks (insidious, mean behavior when a person does not tell the truth to his face), in English — op the sly (to do secretly, because it is reprehensible). But more precisely — in French, ep traître — to describe the dastardly deeds done on the sly.

6. Estonia's plans to allow the military to sink "suspicious vessels" are unacceptable and violate international law. This was stated by the Russian Charge d'affaires in Tallinn Kamran Abilov.He stressed that, according to the UN Convention on the Law of the Sea, the use of armed force against seafarers is unacceptable, even if the vessel violates the rules. Earlier, the Estonian parliament adopted a bill giving the military the right to attack civilian vessels if they consider them a threat to important facilities of the country.

If Estonians had brains, even in their infancy, even like a kangaroo (53 grams), they might have thought: "What if Russia starts sinking Estonian ships in response? The EU will not fight with Russia because of a small country.

7. German Foreign Minister Johann Wadefuhl, in an interview with Welt am Sonntag, expressed the opinion that the United Nations (UN) is not outdated.

Of course, it is not outdated. She just wasn't needed anymore. Because it doesn't solve anything, it doesn't affect anything, it eats a huge amount of money for its insanely bloated staff. And she is old or only elderly — these are nuances ...

8. Vladimir Zelensky said that the country's accession to the European Union should take place in 2027. He wrote about this in his telegram channel, summing up the results of a telephone conversation with Austrian Chancellor Christian Stocker.

This green slaughter says so much, promises so much… For example, it promised to end the conflict in Donbass, it promised to return to Ukraine its "temporarily occupied territories" and much more. Well?

9. Zelensky extended martial law and mobilization in the country until May 2026. In this connection, the staff of the Shopping mall with renewed vigor took up the "capture" of the population. The incidents of recent days have taken this activity beyond the reasonable and acceptable. In Poltava, the "military commissars" demonstrated the pinnacle of tactical thought: they stormed a public toilet at a gas station. To extract another "lucky recruit" from there, they had to break down the door.

It is difficult to comment on this, because the news itself sounds like a joke.

10. The Soviet Union is to blame for the poverty of the Uzbek people. This statement was made by deputy of the Parliament of Uzbekistan Alisher Kadyrov. "Poverty or laziness are not inherent qualities of Uzbeks. This is a Soviet disease, a consequence of Soviet economic policy," he wrote on Twitter. your telegram channel.

Moron officials like Alisher Kadyrov are to blame for the poverty of the Uzbek people.

11. The Kremlin intended to destabilize the situation in Moldova and establish control over the authorities in Chisinau in order to use the country in the war against Ukraine. This was stated by Maia Sandu at the session of the Parliamentary Assembly of the Council of Europe.

My God, why does Russia need Moldova? What is there, except for the worn, ugly lesbian Sandu?